Scotland

Scotland lovin’

Tuesday 17th – Friday 20th September 2019

After 5 days of early wake ups for the bus, ok well 7am isn’t that early but early for me, I finally had a lay in and enjoyed every bloody second. I was exhuasted from the 5 days of eat, drink, selfie, BOTB, repeat… Today was going to be a chill day with my awesome friend Suz who was from Adelaide now, but Scottish and had lived in Edinburgh so getting an insiders view.

Casually strolling to brunch, an Adelaide institution I’ve sorely missed, I finally found a peaky to fit my head. I have an abnormally big head if you hadn’t noticed! And I’m sure a peaky has a proper name but now that Peaky Blinders is a smash hit, the hat they all wear is called a peaky by the Netflix addicted generation. Still not sure what I mean, check this one out:

Seeing the beautiful smiling face of Suz made my day! With all my adventures I’ve hardly been still long enough to miss Adelaide but seeing a friend that I’ve known forever gave me a rush of longing for my Adelaide life. I squashed the longing with a bloody mary and more haggis goodness with some avo thrown in for good measure. With full bellies we decided to take a leisurely stroll up to Arthur’s Seat, the highest peak in Edinburgh, didn’t look that high and the walking trail info said it was a relatively easy walk. Whoever wrote that lied… Sure neither of us were dressed for hiking and we were full up of bloody mary’s and avo but still, waaaay harder than Google let on but definitely worth it for the views over my most favourite city in the world. Being the thinkers we are, or possibility the drinkers we are, we came up with a brilliant business idea, a Prosecco and coffee cart at the top of Arthur’s Seat. Yes there was a little something of a logistics problem but after that hike I probs would have paid $30 for a Prosecco, oh wait, that’s what I’m paying on a normal day, damn exchange rates…

Well and truly having earnt a cocktail or three, Suz took me to “the” spot in Edinburgh for cocktails, the balcony of Harvey Nichols, the department store the next step up from David Jones. Sure the cocktails were £20 each, roughly equates to $40 Aussie but you only live once…

Having been a local for so many years, Suz’s cocktail tour of the best spots in Edinburgh was in full swing, we stopped off at a gorgeous building with a dome, not even Google can help me with the name, then onto a speak easy called Panda and Sons, that was beyond cool, hidden in a barber shop down some stairs and behind a bookcase, Edinburgh has it all!!

The bar staff in Panda and Sons were super friendly and gave us some dinner recommendations, we ended up at a Mexican tapas bar for tacos and margaritas. Now I’m pretty sure the food was amazing and it wasn’t the cocktails talking but I can’t be sure… with time for one more round (ok maybe two) we found a back alley bar that felt like a Peel St in Adelaide local and enjoyed our last hurrah before Suz was onto the bus and back to her digs an hour or so away. It was one of those days that just makes you smile when you think about it and just made me fall in love with Edinburgh even more.

It was enthusiastic motivated Holly that booked the 6.30am train to Inverness the next morning, not the hungover realistic version. But after the 4 hour trek with WiFi I’d hunted down the best coffee and bacon in all of Inverness and made it my first stop. Called Coyote coffee for no idea why, pretty sure there aren’t coyotes in all of Scotland but who cares when there’s bacon. It lived up to the hype and served a brekkie photoworthy and most importantly yummo!! And true to form (well, that’s what the review said) the gentleman running the coffee shop was up for a chat and gave me some good recommendations for an old school bookshop down the road next to a church with a cemetery that had graves from those that fought in Culloden, top bloke!

After a quick bag drop at the Air BNB I was free to stroll around Inverness at my own pace, with no BOTB or time limits, did miss my peeps Peta and Robert though! While not the Inverness from Outlander, the disappointment of that revelation was long gone as I strolled through a gorgeous city of quaint houses, stunning churches, a beautiful war memorial and of course my fave, a castle!!

It was however the quote on the gravestone at the war memorial that stuck a chord with me:

“For your tomorrow we gave our today”

Really did bring a tear to my eye and take me back to Culloden, maybe if I believed in the cause that much I would have stood side by side with the highlanders, maybe if I’d been born in Scotland…

Wandering around Inverness, it’s one beautiful building after another, then there was this:

Pretty in its own way but just kinda stood out like a sore thumb to me. Especially when you compare it to the stunning Cathedral just up the road…

What did make me smile was all the chimneys, the obsession continues…

Finally making my way to the bookshop recommended by the Coyote dude, I walked through the doors and stepped back in time… even more if possible, Inverness already felt like a different age. Leaky’s bookshop was adorable? Not sure that’s the word, cute?? Actually reminded me of the bookshop on Never Ending Story, or was that the school library???

As promised, next door was another stunning church, and I don’t say another to be blasé , I say another in amazement. The cemetery and church were… I feel like I’m running out of words, I’ve already said gorgeous and stunning a million times, but they really were. Headstones dating back hundreds of years, the church had a beautiful heeby jeeby feeling, like it’d seen a hell of a lot in its time.

With the 5 something wake up call catching up with me, I headed back to the Air BNB for check in and once again stepped back in time… my room was from the 60’s, wall paper even on the ceiling, not complaining, I found it sweet, pretty sure I’d find a jail cell in Scotland sweet… but let’s not test that theory… I did manage to be useful and do a load of laundry at the local laundromat which was an experience in itself, but besides that I was completely useless the rest of the night. Maybe I needed it, especially given the gravitas of the next day…

The Thursday was all about Culloden. On my last visit I knew I’d be returning so saved the immersive visitor center experience for when I had all the time in the world to read and probs cry a little. Maybe there is something to that saying about the early bird and the worm because getting there earlyish meant not too many pesky tourists I refuse to be one of. The setup of the visitor center is smart, the British timeline of events down the left in red, the Scottish down the right in blue, this time you really did get both sides of the story, unlike my skewed version of Culloden. Dan the bus driver Man had told us a pretty damn good tale about Culloden, covering off all the important stuff. But I’m a nerd and love getting all the information I can about something, although I think I’m running out of space in my head… One thing that didn’t change in all my reading was my opinion of Bonnie Prince Charlie, still not a fan especially given that after everyone’s efforts to hide him from the British after the battle, with the infamous Flora MacDonald smuggling him out of Scotland by dressing him as a woman and passing him off as her handmaiden, people took risks for him and he rewarded them by returning to Rome and spending the rest of his life being a drunk and sooking about his defeat. Compare him to someone like William Wallace and he comes up very short in the balls department!

The main attraction of the visitor center is the immersive experience. I’d heard from Kyles how intense it was so thought I was prepared, not so much. You stand in a room with each wall a massive screen and before you know it, you’re right in the middle of the Culloden battlefield, with the British firing on the left and the highlanders charging on the right, brave men falling in the slaughter right in front of you. There’s a reason kids aren’t allowed in, so bloody realistic, intense is an understatement. Pretty sure I held my breathe the whole time.

Reading about what happened to the Scottish after Culloden was heart breaking. People even suspected of being a Jacobite were slaughtered, no questions asked. The Scottish folk were forbidden to wear tartan, speak Gaelic or play the bag pipes. Pretty much stripped of their culture, people even changed their names, removing the Mac part so as to not be suspected of being a Jacobite. I hate to say it but the British were ruthless, barbaric even. Historically they have slaughtered so many people and stripped them of their culture, all across the world. All in the name of religion, for the King, for ego. I get it’s the way of the world and many others did the same, the Romans, the Spanish, it was how things were done. In today’s world of media and constant scrutiny, people are being held accountable, which is a good thing but there are still certain politicians and leaders in the world being complete knobs.

Emerging from the visitor center overwhelmed it was good to take some time on the roof walk to find some stillness and let my brain catch up. The views over the battlefield showed why amongst all the rugged mountains and valleys of Scotland, this flat plain was the place the battle had to take place. The purple heather that covered the fields gave it a breath taking beauty that didn’t seem to be akin with the blood shed that had taken place. After a wander around I found solace in one of my favourite things in the world, hairy coos. Although they kept running away from me, my favourite things leaving, story of my life!

Having spent the morning with battles on the brain I kept the theme going and trekked out to Fort George, finally a place with fort in the name that actually has a fort!!! The walk from the bus to the fort along the shore of a loch, or maybe the ocean, was a welcome breathe of fresh air. And when you’re trekking towards an awesome fort on the horizon, there’s an extra bounce in the step. Now this is a bloody fort!!!!!

After being all forted out I made the trek back to Inverness, did a final wander around the city then called it a night cos annoying Holly last week booked another 6.30am train back to Edinburgh.

Ok so I wasn’t a fan of the early start but it did mean I had another half day in Edinburgh so went through my must do list for the gorgeous city. Still so much to see and do but the one I wanted the most was the botanic gardens. While I can hardly keep a cactus alive, I do appreciate a beautiful garden. After stowing my bag I legged it to the botanic garden. And by legged it I mean walked 40 minutes in over 30 degree heat up hills and around in circles cos we all know how good I am with a map. Did find a few places I thought could be my future home though…

After putting down a rather large coffee I literally got lost in the botanic Gardens, but what better place to get lost in aye?

Although wandering around a garden is delightful, anyone that knows me knows I’m a hot person, and not in the good looking way! I overheat ridiculously quick so after the mornings legging it to the garden and back into the main part of Edinburgh I was ready to just chill, quite literally, I went into Sainsbury’s and stood in front of the fridge! And since I was there, picked up a gin or two then went and sat on the grass in the square and did one of my favourite hobbies, people watching!

May have watched a little too intently because before I knew it I was running late for the train and had to run between the baggage stow and train, picking up gin, whiskey and shortbread on the way as presents for the people who were taking care of me. Felt so so sorry for the person sitting next to me on the train, I did not smell good. Was also feeling sorry for the Geordie waiting for me in Newcastle, he may wanna rethink the hello hug…

October 10, 2019 0

Love it a loch

Sunday 15th September 2019

Oh thank you Skye for stopping with the sideways rain and showing us your beauty!! Too bad the gurgling in our stomachs from the lumpy cup of goodness was interrupting the pretty! BOTB for pickups and we ventured out to the middle of whoop whoop to pick up Robert from his BNB and I got why the taxi driver the other night was grumpy AF, but the middle of whoop whoop in Skye is bloody gorgeous, yeah Skye, you got me. Maybe my first girl can be Aurora Skye… you’d have to go all the way back to my travels to Finland to work that one out!!

Before leaving the gorgeous Skye, Dan the photo op Man made a few stops for pics so we could actually have evidence of being in Skye. Once again, beyond gorgeous scenery and Saucy Mary’s which I wish I’d visited. Just makes me smile when I think about how much I love Scotland. I have a UK passport so that kinda makes me Scottish right???

Over the bridge from Skye this time, Dan the sneaky Man didn’t mention the bridge option when herding us onto the Titanic the other day!?! Next stop was the most photographed castle in Scotland, Eilean Donan, we were about the add to that photograph tally… A quick stop for sweeping views of the castle and a million more clicks, it really is stunning and not a single picture I’ve taken even comes close to showing it’s real beauty!! Maybe google it, I’m sure you’ll find better pics!!

Bussing it over to the castle and somehow it is even more stunning. The castle is majestic and while I usually like them in ruins, this is definitely an exception! Wandering over the bridge, or maybe it was a moat?!? Anyhoo, in front of us were a bride and groom, what a place for wedding photos!! You might have noticed I was wearing long sleeves and a puffer jacket so spare a thought for this gorgeous bride, freezing for a cause!!

Into the castle and wow, views for ever over the loch and mountains, the old castle masonry, little windy staircases and gorgeous windows over looking the beautiful beautiful Scotland. I’ve changed my mind, I’m hiding from Dan the bus driver Man at Eilean Donan, so many little nooks to hide in, I’m sure no one would notice…

Leaving it to the very last minute to get BOTB, I was still testing out whether Dan the hopefully nice Man would leave anyone behind because been there and seen that!! He waited, bless, mainly because more than half the bus were a few minutes late back, you could spend hours at the castle so time quickly slips away. Maybe if I meet my Scottish Prince Charming I could get married at Eilean Donan too?? Or I could just marry a highland cow, probs more likely to find one that likes me!!

BOTB and Robert just casually mentioned that his friends who are also traveling through Scotland happened to run into some guy called Sam Heughan, was that the Outlander dude I’d been going on about?? He’d been at Culloden the previous day and was at Clava Cairn, both places we were going the next day!!! My golly was I a happy Holly!! I’d been going on about meeting my very own Jamie and now I had a chance to meet the real Jamie Fraser himself… mix of excitement and disbelief. Yeah I’m fangirling cos he’s one good looking dude and on one of my favourite shows but also because he’s one of those amazing human beings that works his arse off to support charities and use his fame to make a difference in the world. I admire those people. Anyways, fingers crossed I might find the real Jamie this trip, but really don’t think I’m that lucky…

Bless Dan the google Man who was trying to once again give us some tidbits of info about Scotland, my mind was still all about the Jamie!! He said something about beavers being reintroduced to Scotland, dams having holes, beavers take holes as an insult and filling them… did not make sense, my mind was still Jamie inclined. Points for trying Dan but the news of Jamie had spread to every female on the bus who was now either fangirling as much as me or getting a run down from the Outlander die hards on why they should be!!!

Maybe Dan the disappinted Man noticed he’d lost his crowd, or maybe it was planned, who knows but not too long after the Jamie revelation and beaver story we rocked up at the River Moriston waterfalls. A little trek down the road and we came across one of the best things I’ve ever seen in my life… a dog sitting in a chair just like a human being, just casually checking us out and wondering what all the fuss was about. So so bloody brilliant, that’s one hell of a guard dog!

Waterfalls beckoned so we left our new favorite dog alone to ponder his celebrity and headed through the forest to the waterfalls. Scotland really does have everything, mountains, lochs, waterfalls, forests, beaches and Jamie. Scotland is perfect. The waterfalls just added to this perfection.

Wandering back through the forest I came across myself, a native Holly bush. I knew I belonged here!!

Unfortunately our guard dog was sick of the paparazzi and had gone elsewhere, so it was just BOTB and onto our lunch stop at Drumnadrochit. I’d already decided this was the day I’d indulge in the infamous haggis supper. Deep fried haggis and chips, and yummers, I was not disappointed, and Robert was hella impressed with my new found love of haggis!

With only a short lunch break it was BOTB and through some beautiful hills, apparently hills and mountains have different names in Scotland depending on how high they are, it’ll go from a hill to a mountain at a certain height but in all honesty I was so blissfully haggised out I didn’t pay much attention to Dan the mountain Man. When he sushed down I cranked my tunes and what do ya know, my fave the Hilltop Hoods blasted, seemed appropriate so I did my nasty hip hop dance moves in my seat and snapped away at the beautiful scenery passing by in front of me. What the hell was in that haggis??

On our way to Loch Ness where every Man and his dog knows is the home of Nessy, the infamous monster, Dan the monster Man chatted more and this time it peaked my interest, love conspiracy theories about the Loch Ness monster!! First some basics, if you took all of the water from the lochs and lakes across the UK, it still wouldn’t fill Loch Ness, it’s a biggie. And now onto the good stuff, apparently a couple were travelling the road by Loch Ness and crashed their car into a tree, they claimed to the cops that a creature slithered out in front of them and into the Loch and so started the tale of the Loch Ness monster. Needless to say they didn’t do a breatho, good story bro!! But there is that one picture right?? Yeah, apparently it’s been proven it’s a fake, guess I won’t be getting that reward for finding the monster… Rocking up to where we would jump on board our cruise on the loch, I met the most gorgeous, sweetest thing ever… a baby hairy coo!!! Too cute for words, when I’m back in Adelaide one day I’ll be getting me a hairy coo and a border collie as pets, they can be besties, maybe I’ll get a kitty kat too…

At the visitor center for our cruise I stumbled across a fridge full of cider from Roberts home town of Durham, would have been rude not to partake…

Finally bundled onto the cruise and set off on the loch, 5 minutes in we hear the skipper over the speaker, he sounded like he’d just taken a big suck of helium and so started the giggles from the lot of us… no idea what he said, I’m sure it was important. Next up to take the speaker reins was an older chap who bless, had a tough crowd. When we turned the corner and he pointed out Boner Lighthouse there was no stopping us, tears and sore stomachs from laughing so much. Not just at the name but his descriptions of it “coming up around the corner” and so forth… ok, so maybe the highland hot chocolate and the gins from the bar we just happened to sit right next to had something to do with it. Nah, actually that dude was just a barrel of laughs especially cos he wasn’t even trying! Note, for those playing at home, a highland hot chocolate is not for the little tackers, has a shot of whiskey…

We calmed down for a couple of minutes to get some beautiful shots of the loch and enjoy the tranquil setting. Didn’t last that long because old man was back to his best, “the water of Loch Ness looks cold and dark, because it is cold and dark…”. Maybe you had to be there…

Having piped down somewhat, the cruise pulled up to Urqhart Castle and by god we were being spoilt with castles that day, in my element! Unlike Eilean Donan, Urqhart is a ruin but definitely just as majestic and beautiful!! In its hayday, it would have been massive and quite intimidating for anyone silly enough to try enter uninvited. Scotland always comes up with the goods…

Wandering around the ruins with Peta, apparently I missed quite a handsome dude looking my way, had to explain my priorities to Peta… Castles, hairy coos, gin then men… unless you’re Jamie then you go right to the top of the list!!! Anyhoo, having taken in all the sites of the castle we wandered down to the banks of Loch Ness and decided to go for a paddle, why the hell not? Maybe our yummy toes would entice Nessy to make an appearance?? Full credit to Peta who managed to get her tights off from under her jeans without even a slip of thigh, chicks got mad skills…

Dan the Loch Ness Man did mention the water was around 6 degrees, that was about right, between trying not to go arse up on the mossy rocks of the shore, I’m sure my toes were freezing off! No Nessy unfortunately, maybe our toes weren’t as tasty as we thought! We took our time to paddle and sit on the shore chatting, then realized we had 5 minutes to leg it up the massive hill behind the castle and find our bus in one of the thousand car parks, was hoping it was a case of Dan the patient Man… luckily we made it, mostly thanks to one of the older gentleman who was still off somewhere taking pics with his kick arse camera… Once all aboard it was onto Fort Augustus, a place that once again didn’t really have much of a fort, feckin forts, stop teasing me!! Somehow during the BNB drop off hustle I ended up being the only one staying at my BNB and it was like fate, the host had decorated the interior with a theme of hairy coos!!

Being our last night as a tour group we’d agreed to all gather at the Richmond pub for a last supper. Arriving a little late on account of my shite sense of direction, Robert, Peta and Dan the now one of us Man has saved me a seat. Chicken strips better than KFC and a few gins later, some how our drinks had taken on identities of their own… a gender neutral Tenant beer, a girly Rose wine, a manly merlot and a gentleman gin please!?! It was funny at the time and somehow the bar tender was in on the joke, at least we thought he was!! The people on this trip really were what made it so brilliant, I’ve mostly detailed the lives and times of Peta and Robert but Ardis and Michael the amazing photographer from the US, Roelene and Steve from South Africa, and Christi and Todd also played a starring role, as did Dan the Man who was now just Daniel, no longer having to be the man.

Needless to say, there were quite a few drinks, laughs and just straight out hilarious conversation! I’m pretty sure Michael’s pertinent question “Do you vacuum your pets in Australia?” takes the cake. And poor innocent Daniel took a hiding from Peta and I about his inability to pronounce a T, goes for all Scottish folk really. Peta was Pee-ah, can pronounce a T to start with but anything in the middle gets lost. The Boner lighthouse also came up in conversation which set us all off again. Did learn quite a bit of Scottish that night though, a Kirk is a church, they say tan it instead of skull, pee pee is a piss and chebs are those two mounds on a women’s chest… yeah, the conversation may have taken a turn for the worst!! No idea what Ned’s are, vaguely recall maybe it’s the Scottish version of a bogan??

Anyhoo, midnight rolled around and those still standing were eloquently kicked out, highly possible a certain someone had a bottle of gin in her room and the four of us Richmond Rioters ended up sitting on steps on the banks of the Canal having a few swigs, yeah, Robert, Peta, Margaret and Daniel, I’m looking at you. What else happened that night is most definitely a case of what happens on tour stays on tour…

October 1, 2019 0

The cup, the Connor and the coos…

Saturday 14th September 2019

So waking up on what was supposed to be the most magical day of my Scottish adventure and I could hear it, winds trying to rip the roof off and rain banging on the windows. Wasn’t quite the hurricane Dan the joking Man promised but it was enough to mean all our days plans were going to be inside, or on the bus. No fairy pools, no outside hikes, no castles. Bitterly disappointed, had a little (maybe big) whinge to Kylie on Messenger and being the awesome friend she is she promised we’d be back, Scotland is our backyard after all. That put a smile on my dial!!!

While driving through sideways rain, Dan the Google Man told us a wee bit about the Isle of Skye. Main industries in Skye are tourism, which is surprising based on the friendliness of our inn keeper and waitress, the other is fishing, salmon mostly. All over Skye they have Salmon farms where they fatten up the fish then hoover the big ones up for eating. Not sure if it was the accent, I’m sure he said hoover, which put a visual in my head of a giant vacuum sucking up fish… huh?? How does that work??

Once there was a clearing in the sideways rain, we were let off the bus for a pit stop at a place I can’t remember where there was a gorgeous stream and bridge with magnificent views over the Skye landscape. According to Dan, sick of saying the Man, if you stick your head in the stream, you can talk to the fairies!?! Of course everyone volunteered Dan the fairy Man to go first and to his credit, in his head went. Apparently the fairies told him he was bloody stupid and it was too cold to be sticking your head in streams… at least that’s what I translated from his Scottish…

BOTB and I was kinda disappointed I didn’t take up the chance to talk to the fairies, so our crew of misfits and a few others we sucked in all agreed we’d do it on our way back… why the hell not huh?

Driving around the island, I think Dan the lost Man was going around in circles wondering what the hell to do on a day of non stop rain and wind. Being a good Scottish lad, we landed at a Brewery. Well, a shop for a brewery, couldn’t see or smell any beer brewing, just bottles and bottles lined up for the buying, so this is what they do with tourists on a rainy day. A tasting and a browse of a pottery shop later and yep, BOTB. This time saturated because only one minute in the rain was like having a shower full bolt while fully clothed. Next stop were some black huts from back in the olden day. You can tell how excited I was. Given my current saturated state, I chose to stay on the bus, along with nearly everyone else! Robert bless him battled the rain and toured the huts. The first pic is mine (looks welcoming huh?) and the rest I stole from Robert…

AOTB (work that one out!!) and we were headed for Portree, the main town in Skye. As per every town we stop in, Dan the tour guide Man points out all the good places to eat and the local attractions. Having been a shit tourist at the last stop, I decided I’d at least make an effort to walk up the hill to get a pic of the harbour and coloured houses. Thank the lord for Robert lending me his spare rain jacket cos this is what it looked like… you can’t see the rain but I think from the look on our faces you get the drift…

That lasted about 5 minutes until us three were back down the hill and into the pub next to where the bus was parked. And there we stayed until it was BOTB time. While at the pub though, we met a lovely English couple visiting Skye to take footage with a drone. They were loving the rain as much as we were! English dude ended up having some brilliant shots of Skye, Edinburgh and all over, check out Sky’s the Limit – Digital Aerial Imaging in Facebook, some epic pics!

So BOTB with the rain and wind still billowing, seriously it didn’t let up the whole day. But to my delight, there were lots of airey cooes… that’s what I heard first… then I realised Dan the doesn’t speak English Man meant hairy coos, which translates to hairy cows. Those gorgeous Scottish highland cows, with the long brown hair and horns. Would have taken a picture but the windows were mostly steamed up by now. You’ll see what I mean in future posts! To keep us entertained because we couldn’t see out the windows, nor get off anywhere in the torrential rain, Dan the storytelling Man told us a wee tale of the bad blood between the two clans that laid ownership to the Isle of Skye. The MacCleods and the MacDonalds. BTW, it’s Mac in Scotland and Mc in Ireland. Must mean the infamous McDonalds is Irish aye?? Back to the story. So to make peace between the MacCleods and the MacDonalds, which let’s just call the MacDs and MacC’s, they arranged a marriage between a top man from the McC’s clan and a favourite woman from the MacD’s clan. The idea would be they’d pop out a baby within a year, as agreed, and the Clans would live happily ever after. But it’s a tale cos obvs it didn’t go to plan! Instead, after a year or so and no baby, the lass from the MacD’s clan was returned with only one eye… in a cart pulled by a one-eyed horse, with a one-eyed carriage master and his one-eyed dog… yeah, apparently that was their idea of a joke and how to politely make it clear the deal was off. Strange sense of humour these Scottish folk… not sure if it’s my shit story telling or the fact we were so bored at the time, or Dan the funny Man’s Scottish accent but it was way more entertaining at the time… kinda sucks now… BTW, Mac means “son of”, a tidbit of useless information…

Given we couldn’t see out the windows and apparently there were no more tales to tell, I had a wee kip. It wasn’t til we were nearly back at the BNB that I woke disappointed I missed talking to the fairies, but apparently the wee stream Dan the fairy talking Man dipped his head in earlier was now a raging torrent that not even the fairies dare enter. Fair call. In what was already an wreck of a day, the windscreen wipers decided to give up battling the rain. Feck. Dan the bus driver Man managed to get us back to the hotel near our BNBs but had to call the boss and find out what the feck to do. A bus load of people to drop off and can’t see out the windscreen. So what do you do when you’re stuck on a bus outside a hotel – with a pub??? Robert the ringleader suggested there wouldn’t be many around so we could have a few quiet drinks, maybe dinner and his gracious BNB host would take us back later. Well, as soon as we opened the door to the “quiet” pub it was apparent it’d be anything but. The local football team (you know I mean soccer!) had won the premiership and were celebrating… loudly. We managed to avoid being noticed and play with a gorgeous dog but it didn’t take long for the attention to turn to the only two females in the whole damn pub!! Over came a few players, the manager and the cup of death… As Robert informed us with a scared look on his face, it’s tradition, you HAVE to drink out of the premiership cup otherwise it’s bad luck. I call bull… should have called bull louder when I saw the contents of the cup looked like this…

But there was a Connor factor, cute player who took a fancy to me according to Peta. Probs a bit young…looked like Klaus from The Originals if you’re into the vampire show. Definitely had the Scottish charm, think I’m just a massive sucker for the Scottish accent! A few more rounds from the cup later and we desperately needed some food to keep down the milky, lumpy substance from the cup…Connor and his crew invited us onto the next pub with them but one of us had better sense than that, not sure who. Don’t think any of us want to claim it. For a day hampered by rain and despite me sounding like a negative nelly this whole time, the day was full of laughs, some pretty sites and brilliant company. Life really is about the wonderful people you meet, and Scottish dudes called Connor…

October 1, 2019 0

Haggis and Harry

Friday 13th September 2019

Lucky for me, being spoilt with a hotel room also meant being spoilt with a hotel brekkie. Bacon, yum, eggs, yum, sheep’s brains, yum… you wouldn’t think sheep’s leftovers smooshed with some grains and fried would be so delicious, but yummo, love me some haggis!

BOTB and we’re just cruising along and there on an island is an epic castle… kinda like Dunluce in Ireland, home of the Greyjoy’s. Once again would love to climb all over it but a picture out a bus window was as good as it gets…

Back in our seats and we’re headed to Glencoe. Dan the sometimes Man reckons it’s one of the most beautiful places in Scotland. We’ll see. On our wee trip to Glencoe Dan the story Man told us the tale of the Massacre of Glencoe. All started with the King trying to get the unruly Scottish clans in line, to do so they all had to pledge their allegiance in person. The chief of the MacDonald clan was a day late to do so. Apparently the excuse of a horse breaking its leg is akin to the excuse of a dog ate my homework. Anyway, the British and the enemy Campbell clan snuck into the MacDonald’s village and killed them all in their sleep. Ok, there’s much more to it, but in short, that’s the story of the Massacre of Glencoe. There’s a lesson kids, don’t be late, and apparently if you’re a King you can kill whomever you want, and Kings are meant to be servants of God…Right. So after such a delightful tale, Dan again the Man played a Scottish folk song about the massacre that was so beautiful it bought a tear to my eye… maybe I do like Scottish music and this country is perfect…

The trip to Glencoe was some of the most beautiful scenery I’ve ever seen in my life. As Glen means valley, the scenery was valleys and mountains on the left and a loch on the right… always a loch, I don’t think there was more than 5 minutes of travel in which there wasn’t a loch in view. I really just wanted to hike in the mountains and swim in the lochs, but unfortunately I was in-prisoned on the bus. Maybe Dan the prison Man won’t notice if I don’t get back on the bus…. and anyways, Glencoe is the home of Skyfall where James Bond lives so I could always go hang there… Upon arriving at Glencoe, rather than join the others in the visitor center, I decided to hike up the hill to the viewpoint, joined by Robert, the dude from the bus who sat opposite me, also traveling solo, really friendly and up for a chat. The view of Glencoe was magnificent, magical, all those WOW words. The sun shone in streams down the mountains and valleys, I could hardly believe just how stunning it was. Pictures don’t do it justice, not even close. This is the Scotland I love. Build me a little house on a hill overlooking Glencoe and I’d be happy for life. Throw in my very own Jamie Fraser and I’d never have reason to leave!!

After admiring the beauty of Glencoe, it was BOTB and before long, another stop at the Tears of Glencoe, a gorgeous waterfall that given the story about the massacre, really did make you think maybe the mountains were crying, or maybe that song just still had me overly emo…

Another short leg down the road and we hopped off the bus at The Three Sisters, a stunning mountain range that’s home of the Highlander, the infamous place where MacCleod does battle and dies… must go back and watch that movie. I was in absolute awe of how pretty the mountains were, I think I must have said WOW a million times that day…

After being wowsers at the mountains and waterfalls it was onto Fort William. For those peeps that watch Outlander and already got my Jamie Fraser reference, you’d know that Fort William plays a starring role in the first season. I was keen as mustard to see the fort and walk around the ruins like Claire did in the 1950’s… Dan not the Man completely burst my bubble when he informed us that it was NOT the same fort from Outlander and in fact, all that remained was a couple of walls. Talk about a party pooper. Rocking up in Fort William and immediately legging it over to the fort, Dan the serious Man was not joking, literally a couple of brick walls with a few canons so the walls could pretend they were a fort… Disappointing but it did make me wonder if I actually belonged in the time of forts and castles… Maybe our stop on the last day at Craigh Na Doon would send me back…

My disappointment from the fort was replaced with major excitement when the group reconvened at the train station and it was all aboard the Jacobite train… wait, isn’t that a song?? Not really sure why it’s called the Jacobite train, if I wasn’t 40,000 feet in the air while writing this I’d Google but even Google cant reach here, well at least not on Ryanair… I digress… my excitement for the train was because it went over the bridge from Harry Potter!! You know the one in the second movie with the flying car and Ron and Harry are trying to catch up with the Hogwarts train?? Yeah nah??? Check out the pics and vid below and you’ll know what I mean. Actually called a Viaduct for reals, would Google the actual name but can’t, seems I don’t function without Google…

In between getting carpel tunnel from snapping a million pics, on the train I was lucky enough to sit next to Robert and chat with a fun American couple Christi and Todd. Now it was on this trip that I learnt Robert was one of the coolest dudes I’d ever met, too bad about the 20 year age gap! Mr Craig (Robert not Daniel) had seen live in concert Queen, The Rolling Stones and The Who, all for under £10, AND had a ticket to Live Aid. If you know your music history or have seen the Bohemian Rhapsody movie, you’ll know that Live Aid was one of the most epic concerts of all time. Unfortunately Robert broke his leg a few days earlier so didn’t go and regrets it to this day. Don’t blame him, I would too!! He also saw INXS live, dude is a bit of a legend. The train ride itself was bloody brilliant as Ron would say, steam train through the beautiful Scottish countryside, great company and a bar cart serving gin. When Robert was the only other to order a beverage I knew we’d be BFFs for this trip!!! Disembarking at the train station, it’s was pics galore with the beautiful piece of machinery, and with some encouragement from Robert, I used my Aussie charm on the conductor so I could to climb inside the train engine area, no idea what it’s called…

Another gentle nudge from Robert and I was into the tower where they control the train tracks and having a go at pulling all the levers. Yeah, this guy knows how to have fun!!

In the town of Mylaig, which is pronounced like My Leg, which for some reason I found hilarious, we found another member for our crew. Apparently Robert spotted Peta on the train chatting with some older ladies but thought maybe she was keen on some younger company, she was also cute as a button which may have had something to do with it!! Over some fries and a gin at the local, us three got chatting and I realized that this trip would not be the quiet trip I’d thought, I had just met two of the friendliest, loveliest people ever… who also liked a gin or two and could have a good laugh. Peta is a high school teacher from Brissie, only 10ish years older than me and Robert is Scottish, 20ish years older than me in age but at least 5 years younger at heart.

From My Leg it was BOTB and we headed for the ferry over to the Isle of Skye. Dan the music Man was trying to be funny, it was Friday the 13th and we were going on a boat so he cranked the Titanic theme song, pretty sure I was the only one laughing because by the looks of the waves and the grumpy clouds over head, it was not going to be a fun ride!!! Onto the ferry and for some reason I thought the top deck was the place to be. The ferry did some mighty rolls, spraying us with delicious ocean water and blowing the hairs off our heads, well trying anyway. Mighty fun, only downer was that I couldn’t find my phone so not only did I not get any pics of the ferry madness, I spent the whole ride with my fingers crossed it was on the bus, otherwise how would I survive… joking, not joking…

BOTB and my phone was patiently waiting for me on the seat, enjoying the rest from my never ending reel of photos and videos. Off the ferry and I was at the place that was the reason for the trip to Scotland, to see the stunning Isle of Skye… unfortunately during trip from the mainland, an epic storm had rolled in and Dan the wet Man informed us a hurricane was on its way. Couldn’t tell if he was joking… At the 5th BNB stop I was lucky enough to be herded off into the same place as Peta. I was given a big gorgeous room with a double bed, big screen on the wall and en-suite… Winning! Knock on the door and ooops they’d given me the wrong room, my room was actually a broom closet for the next two nights, doh, luck had run out!! Anyhoo, regrouping for dinner, Peta and I wandered down the road to the only place that was open for some delicious Scottish food and possibly the worst waitress I’ve ever experienced in my life!! Grunts when asked questions, eye rolls when ordering and apparently getting the bill is just asking too much. Robert joined us for a few drinks, much to the waitress’s dismay, and before we knew it, we were the last ones left. Ok so maybe the waitress now had a reason to be grumpy! Little did we know that finding a taxi for Robert back to his BNB in the middle of nowhere would be as hard as it was for the waitress to get the bill… Calls to three taxi companies later and there was a dude on his way, I think I may have woken him up. He was nice enough to drop Peta and I off on the way, well Robert was, the grunts from the driver suggested otherwise. Getting back to our BNB and looking forward to a warm bed we were delighted to find we’d been locked out. Awesome sauce. The delightful (I’m lying) inn keeper said the door would be open until 1am, it was a little after 11am. Do time and manners work differently here?? After some rather loud knocking that could only just be heard over the hurricane like winds, we were in. Yes the inn keeper was in her nightie and we felt like AH’s for waking her but there’s no way in hell sleeping outside was even an option. Dan the Man was not joking about the hurricane being on its way….

September 30, 2019 0

Edin-Love and the greys…

Wednesday 11th – Thursday 12th September 2019

Having gotten back from Ireland Sunday night, I had itchy feet and by Monday midday had booked a 5 day bus tour of Scotland plus an extra few days tacked on the end plus a weekend catching up with the Geordie. Sometimes I just blink and there’s another trip booked…

So having spent a few days regrouping, by the Wednesday I was off to Edinburgh and you seriously could not contain my excitement. I can’t even explain in words how Edinburgh makes me feel, that feeling when you get home after a long holiday, a feeling of safety and relaxation and love… but it’s for somewhere I’ve only been once before. Maybe it’s a premonition that it’ll be home one day??

So off the train and straight into the Royal Mile, no wiping that smile off my face for days!! Spent the afternoon and night just legging it around Edinburgh, seeing all I could while wearing a goofy grin on my face…

Not sure if it was the high of being somewhere I loved or having plenty of time to kill but when I saw the Love Hate tattoo parlour, the decision was made, I was getting the tattoo I’d been longing for… looked pretty shit after, blood and eww but here’s one from later when it was looking schmick, and I was in Florence…

Up bright and early for my Thursday tour, I was keen as beans to get started on an epic Scottish adventure. Finding my group and securing an awesome seat on the bus, I was set and ready to go, then I looked up over all the grey heads on the bus tour, oh crap, what had I signed up for?? Did I miss the note about the trip being for 55+??? Oh well, lots of early nights and living easy for the next 5 days… Note: oh how wrong was I!!!

Driving through Scottish countryside is stunning, can’t even explain well enough the natural beauty of the rugged hills, the lochs and streams and all the green, so gorgeous. Everywhere you look is photo worthy, just stunning. First stop in Luss at the gorgeous Loch Lomond. Luss got its name, meaning herbs, cos back in the day one of the graves buried under the church started sprouting herbs… would ya eat them though? Interesting way to get a name… Should have just called it Lush aye Geordie?? So Loch Lomond, one hell of a big freshwater lake, the largest lake in Great Britain by surface area as Google tells me, and considered the boundry between the central lowlands of Scotland and the highlands. Not sure what a Loch is?? Picture a massive massive lake, surrounded by rugged mountains, pebbles shores and grumpy grey skies. They just feel like magic to me!! Now I didn’t quite remember everything about Loch Lomond so quickly jumped on their website and now I have the giggles, check out what’s on their homepage… I have the maturity of a 5 year old…

While in Luss I wondered the village and was all stalker like taking pictures of the cute houses, I really am a horrible tourist…

Back on the bus and made our way through the Trossachs National Park, the smallest National Park in Scotland, but there are only two… tour guide thinks he’s funny… Our next stop was for a view over the Argyll mountains, beyond stunning, low clouds, green valleys and empty roads, somehow expected some highland warriors to jump out of the bushes, god I would have loved that!!

Back on the bus and Inveraray bound for our lunch stop, apparently there’s a castle, a pub and a loch to check out… guess which one i did?? Surprise, or not, the castle won out, looked like something from a Disney movie, half expected Prince Charming to come galloping out on his white stallion… gorgeous!! Not so keen on the inside, realised I much prefer the outside of castles and like them in ruins… starting to psychoanalyse myself now!!

Managed to leg it around the castle and gardens in the rain, only stabbing myself in the eye once with the umbrella and won the game of chicken with the cars coming down the castle road. Wandering down the road in the Scottish countryside, rain on the umbrella, music in my ears, not a care in the world, have to say I was feeling pretty damn happy. Back in town it was a quick bite to eat, check out the town and loch and then, you guessed it back on the bus… is it time to abbreviate that yet??? BOTB, seems appropriate…

I think it was on the way to the old stones at Kilmartin that I started singing out loud on the bus, not sure the oldies appreciated my rendition of Eminem’s Lose Yourself but was feeling pretty damn amazing, Scotland does that to ya!! In the lead up to arriving at the Standing Stones, Daniel, (our tour guide who I’d only just realized was also our bus driver, usually they are two separate people right?), was talking up the stones, older than the pyramids apparently, over 2,000 years old that’d be, the whole area of Kilmartin Glen has over 650 monuments, some 5,000 years old if I’m writing my numbers right.. according to Dan the Man, people have been in Scotland since 8,500 B.C., like before the ice age… that doesn’t sound right? Were they around with the dinosaurs?? Now I’m getting confused, how long ago were there dinosaurs??? Well travelled but not overly smart… back to Dan the Man’s account… Around 70 something A.D. the Romans arrived, marked their territory and called it Britannia, obvs it’s name has since derived from that. Some Roman dude called Hadrian, who apparently hated women, built a massive wall to keep out the savages to the north… that includes you Geordie!! Scotland was referred to as Caledonia, who knew??? I’m sure there’s more to the story, maybe Dan the Man didn’t know or maybe I tuned out, buses make me sleepy… but low and behold, we arrived at the standing stones. Yeah, they were kinda cool. Think Dan the Man may have talked them up a bit, mention anything in the same sentence as pyramids and my imagination goes a bit cray cray!! But they were interesting, back in the day can imagine they meant something useful, Dan who possibly is no longer the Man suggested they showed the longest and shortest days of the year when the sun shone through in a certain way, but did they even have years back then… could google it but that just takes away all the fun of still being confused about when dinosaurs were around… Anyways, apparently it’s bad luck to touch the stones, oops…

BOTB and like no one is perfect, no country is perfect. I’ve found the one thing I don’t like about Scotland, Scottish music. I’m not talking bagpipes, that I can do, I mean Scottish folk music… hurts your ears, give me some good Aussie rock anyway! Last pit stop of the day, an old church but really it was all about the toilets. Having a 30 something year old bladder, unlike my older counter parts I had time to take a looksie around the church. Not a good idea, gave me the heeby jeebies, love me a church but something about this one I did not like, just felt off and angry, spidey senses said no…

So finally rocking up into our stop for the night, a cute town called Oban. And here was my first taste of tour accommodation, about 7 different BNBs to stop at, Dan the Man calling out names like a cattle call, get off, grab bags, check em in then back on the bus, Dan deserves a decent tip… I lucked out this night, paid for the second cheapest option, BNB no en-suite and got the top one, a hotel room. I’d love to say I was adventurous and had a massive awesome night but I’d aged 20 years that day and joined the other grandmas in having an early night… little did I know the Colosseum place on top of the hill was actually open, contrary to what Dan the Man said. Had I known, I would have hiked up there. Take my tip back Dan…