While being in the Sahara is a dream come true, unfortunately we had to leave at some stage so why not do it under a blanket of stars!! The 5.30am BOTB meant brekkie and loading back onto the bus before the sun peaked out and while the stars were out in full force. Unfortunately my iPhone is only so good and doesn’t capture the grandure of stars so this is as good as it gets!!
Having been awake since 3am for no apparent reason, our long bus ride back to Marrakech was mostly snoozing and Netflix. So here’s a picture of my Berber omelette for lunch and I’m gonna skip right onto Marrakech!!
Back in Marrakech we were checked into the same hotel with a pool which I knew this time I wouldn’t miss out on. For the last time this tour, we were BOTB and again into the main square of Marrakech. This time I knew all about the evil cobras and managed to not even look their way!
Abdul showed us around the markets, talking passionately as he does however we were all pretty exhausted, tired from sitting on a bus doing nothing so when it was time for dinner we all followed Abdul to some place where not a single person ordered a tagine, we were most certainly all tagined out!! After dinner it was back to the hotel where it dawned on us that it was the last night as a group so of course we needed a last group pic and time to farewell all our new friends.
You’d of thought it would have been a big night but with early flights for some and the rest of us knackered, we all agreed a last day hanging by the pool would be the best kind of farewell. And, unfortunately at this stage I was as sick AF, the last few days had seen us, one after another, fall sick with some kind of Moroccan cold that creates enough snot to fill the Sahara. The next morning I wasn’t feeling much better so took it easy with a lay in, til 9 cos that’s late now, then enjoyed the buffet brekkie with the others around the pool. While Kyles and a few others who hadn’t caught the bug were energetic and headed back to the market for some shopping, I was more than happy to hang poolside, mop up my snot and enjoy some vitamin D. Ok so there were a few gins too…
Upon Kyles return I was more energetic, or ginned up enough to jump into the gorgeous pool, careful not to spread snot and germs. Never thought a swim with a cold could make you feel better but definitely going to try that in the future! With the afternoon coming to a close, those of us left, we’d been losing people to their home base as the day wore on, headed to the roof to watch our last sunset over Morocco. It was beautiful but at the same time bittersweet, some trips you don’t want to end and this was one of them! And who knew the roof at this place would have been an amazing place to party, ugh!
Kyles and I had decided to stay somewhere more central to the Médina of Marrakech so along with Aleesha, we bid our group farewell, hoping it wouldn’t be the last time we see those amazing people. Into a somewhat dubious taxi, we headed for our riad, since figuring out what one was and hearing we could stay there, we knew we had to. Aleesha dropped us off and headed to hers around the corner. And when I say dropped us off, we literally jumped out on a street corner that was supposedly the location of our riad and looked around in horror, had we been duped by booking.com? Does this riad actually exist??? To our relief, we found our riad door tucked away in an alley and once again entered into a space we did not expect. A beautiful and old but modern riad, complete with an open roof in the centre. Having booked one on the cheaper side due to a lack of cashola, this place was beyond expectation!!
Quick showers and we wandered out into the Médina of Marrakech looking for food, anything but a tagine. Being tired and indecisive we looked to the advice of a local who got chatting to us, and funnily enough within in 5 seconds flat was questioning us as to why we weren’t married!! He meant no insult, to Moroccans it’s confusing how you could be in your 30s and not married, for both men and women. Taking his advice we found a rooftop terrace with an epic view and yummers food, yes it may have been a tourist trap but who cares! The stork on a rooftop a stones throw away gave Kyles the heeby jeebys, she doesn’t like birds but luckily this one was as tired as us and hardly moved a muscle.
Needless to say I was ready for an early night on account of being a sicky and Kylie kindly obliged. The next day, our last in Morocco, we were greeted by one of the most impressive breakfasts, in that you sit at a table and within a jiffy it’s filled with all types of deliciousness, more than 2 people could possibly eat. Well, I could have eaten it all had I not been sick!!!
Having Aleesha staying around the corner we did a quick stop at what I think was a pharmacy for cold and flu tablets then met up to explore the market and finally do some shopping for more than bathes and gin. If you’ve travelled to south east Asia, like Bali, you know half the fun is the bartering. Although, I don’t find it fun but in this case, being sick and broke I was a hard arse and more than happy to walk away if they didn’t agree to my tightarse price, which worked surprisingly well!! Who knew not caring could actually work in your favour?!? A summer dress, salt n pepper set and door knocker later I was pretty damn impressed with my purchases. Having an epic Moroccan sandwich with chicken, liver, capsicum and who the hell knows what else was also amongst one of my better purchases. Wish I had a pic to show you just how good it was!!! In addition to shopping and stuffing our faces, our must do for the day was a hammam, a Turkish spa where they steam you, scrub you, massage you and leave you feeling amazing, apparently! We’d found one earlier amongst the crazy in the markets and made our way back for what was one hell of an experience. In our bathes we robed up and waited on comfy deck chairs with warm tea, not really knowing what to expect. Then it started, we showered then were into the hot steam room, from where one by one we were pulled out and scrubbed all over with horse hair mits (!?!) and lathered in some kind of muddy gel. I’d seen it around the markets, guess that’s what it’s for. Here’s a pic of it from our very first day!!
Lathered up we were then back in the steam room, which at first meant an avalanche of snot for me but then a clear head finally. Once again pulled out one by one, we were laid down and unexpectantly had cold water thrown over us to wash the muddy gel off. Yikes! Yes our skin felt amazing afterwards but wowsers that cold water was a shock!! It was then back into our robes and waiting on our deck chairs while there was the awkwardness as to whether we were supposed to tip the ladies that had just scrubbed off our gunk. The signs said not to so we didn’t, much to their dismay. Breaking the awkwardness, we were led up to the massage area for half hour massages that were bloody good. Yes there were certain areas like my chebs that hadn’t been massaged by another woman before but it was done in a professional way so all good. Unfortunately that’s where the hammam experience ended, we dressed and were once again back in the markets, with these smiles of absolute relaxation on our faces!!!
Unfortunately our time in Morocco was coming to an end, after farewelling the gorgeous Aleesha we made our way to the airport. During the whole time in Morocco, it was obvious they loved their King, there were pictures of him everywhere. It wasn’t until we were going through customs that it dawned on me who he looked like, Lewis Litt from Suits!! Knew the face looked familiar! What do you think??
It was while waiting for our flight I thought I’d better translate the packet of my cold and flu tablets just to be sure what I was taking. You can imagine my surprise to read to was taking anas. Yep, anas. Monkey anas I think. Along with some extract of liver and heart. No real help, all herbs and anus. In the bin they went.
It was certainly sad to leave Morocco, while I went in not knowing what to expect, it was better than anything I could have imagined and I left with memories and friendships I would cherish for a lifetime. As well as a cold that not even anas could help!
Today was the day I knew I’d be pinching myself a million times over, today we were going to the Sahara desert. The bloody Sahara!!!!! Never thought in this lifetime I’d be lucky enough to see the Sahara, something I’d heard of as a child but never thought I’d see for reals. Feel like I need to break into a chorus of thanks to all the people who have given me this wonderful life but they know who they are and hopefully I have thanked them enough! In case I haven’t, THANK YOU!!
Usually a BOTB call for 6.45am would fill me with dread but when you’re Sahara bound, pretty sure I bounced out of bed. Or just wasn’t as grumpy as I usually am!! Brekkie, packed and BOTB to a gorgeous sunrise that unfortunately doesn’t look as pretty out of the window of a bus!
Being desert bound, as expected the countryside got a little less green and a bit more, well, deserty but by gosh, still as beautiful as ever. To keep us entertained, it was once again Abdul the legend up for the act. Now I can’t exactly pinpoint when he became a legend, it was the little things he did like learning our names, his dad jokes, his funny laugh and his Yallah, but mostly it was his passion and love for his country. Having a tour guide who takes pride in showing you his homeland makes a tour one thousand times more enjoyable!! Anyhoo, our first stop on our looooong trip to the desert was a little village that looked like it belonged in Switzerland, not Morocco! A little alpine village that served as Morocco’s ski resort. Yeah I had that screwed up confused face too, Morocco has ski resorts???? Turns out to get to the Sahara you gotta go over the Atlas Mountains and not just one set, gotta go over the Mid Atlas Mountains and the High Atlas Mountains, I guess they couldn’t think of more imaginative names for them?? So our stop in Ifrane, the mountain village introduced us to something new in Morocco, the cold!!! Having been over heated most the trip it was nice to feel the cold mountain air, for about 5 minutes til I was over it and ready for the cosy warm bus again. Explains the lack of pictures…
Quickly BOTB and we quickly left Switzerland behind and was back in desert looking Morocco. Then out of nowhere, the hills started to have Arabic writing on them. Like big enough that if I read Arabic I’d know what it said. I’m still confused how the hell they do that. Abdul explained they did it with wheat but please tell me more, how do they get the letters so big? How do they mark it out? How do they get it so perfect??? If I wasn’t on a plane i’d google it and tell ya…
The legend explained the writing says “God, motherland and King”, very patriotic. Not a message from the aliens as I was starting to think! More gorgeous countryside and it was time for another pit stop. Just a petrol station, no Switzerland this time. They did however have a range of treats not found in the land of kangaroos, like ketchup pepitas and some weird arse flavour of Monster energy drink. Neither were good. Now I mentioned the trip to the desert was long and while I can’t recall how many hours, something like 7 sounds about right. Luckily Morocco has plenty to keep us entertained along the way. Like this pretty dam just in the middle of nowhere, being as beautiful as ever.
And this massive army base just spouting out of the desert again in the middle of nowhere. Maybe it’s where they keep the aliens??
Then my personal favourite, pulling up into a valley of palm trees. The location on my picture says Aoufous, so let’s go with that. This time we managed to get Abdul to star in and join us for a few snaps, gotta put a face to the legendary, wait for it… Abdul. Also managed to have some fun ourselves. Most fun was still had by Abdul who managed to get a piggy back from Aleesha back to the bus!!
At this stage, it was only just hitting lunch time, although somehow we were already three meals in?!? Our lunch stop at a cafe by a pool was lovely and all but we were all just getting antsy for the desert. Sahara where are you already?? I know good things come to those that wait but I’m not well known for my patience!! Finally, Abdul announced that we are close to our hotel that’s rated 1,000 stars. Yeah that’s code for sleeping outside! I was expecting tents pitched, sleeping on the floor, being kinda cold and uncomfortable but being ok with that because it was the bloody Sahara!!! Boy were we all surprised to get to the place where we were “camping”. Air conditioned main lobby, beautiful gardens, pool, WiFi and most importantly, real beds!!! We were glamping to say the least! Proper rooms with walls, they may not have been out of brick but there were walls and doors and real bathrooms and showers. To say that we were all relieved is an understatement!!
Unloading into our “tents” it was a quick change of clothes to ready ourselves for our Sahara camel trek. Yeah I could hardly believe I was doing that either!! In the hotel lobby Abdul and his cohorts helped us wrap our scarfs into turbans then it was out the back of the hotel to meet our rides.
Upon getting to “camp” we’d had a glimpse of the dunes but it wasn’t until we met our camels that the absolute gloriousness of the Sahara desert was upon us. Massive dunes and a blue sky that contrasted with the red sand so beautifully that we were speechless. Well, we were, the camels not so much. They like to chat!! I hadn’t ridden a camel for a while, not sure I can even recall when I last did, only to know that I have and the getting up and down is quite the carnival ride. Kyles of course in her perfect desert outfit did it with grace, I may have yelped…
Now some how I was lucky enough to be at the front of our camel line, if that’s what it’s called, so I could take in all the glory of the Sahara. I really can’t explain in words how beautiful it is only to say you could not wipe the smile off my face and every second was a pinch me moment that I could hardly believe I was lucky enough to behold. Beautiful, glorious, amazing, stunning, wonderful, not enough words to describe.
After trotting along for about an hourish, being quite comfortable I might add, we stopped at our destination to watch the sunset. I thanked Marlboro for lugging me along, couldn’t have been easy!!
Remember the gorgeous sand dunes I mentioned earlier?? The top of one of those was where we could watch the sunset. My unfit meatball body was not ready for the hike up the sand dunes, the worst torture imaginable on unconditioned thighs but like hell I was going to miss watching the sunset over the Sahara!! And by god, running up Everest would have been worth it for these views!
I think you can agree that the desert is so stunning that I’m forgiven for the ridiculous amount of selfies! It was a once in a lifetime (but hopefully not!) experience so there is no way I don’t want all the pictures as memories for when I’m old n grey and in my rocking chair. After having indulged in all the selfies and pics to last a lifetime, while also taking time out to appreciate the sunset and miraculous place we were so lucky enough to be, there was the getting down to deal with. Some chose just to take their chance and run, those of us with shonky knees chose the slow and sturdy way!! Ads was one of the fast arse ones with his Spider-Man legs which meant he was able take a shot of us snails on the way down, there we are!!!
BOM (got that one mum??) and we meandered back to camp as the sun sank into the dunes and the stars came out to delight us. Hands down that was one of the most amazing and memorable experiences of my life. Pretty sure that when life goes to shit in the future, I’ll be able to think of that afternoon in the Sahara and smile like there’s no tomorrow. Still can’t believe I got to do that and once again am grateful to those that helped me find my way to the Sahara!
Back at camp we were all high on the afternoon’s adventures (not the hash), the chatter and laughter amongst the group was infectious. But it was dinner time. After a day eating like a hobbit, I wasn’t overly hungry but the smorgasbord of food meant that of course I ate. I’m Italian, I was born to eat. Also English and born to whinge in case you hadn’t noticed!! Anyway, the yummy food of more than just tagine thank goodness was washed down with gin along with a side of gin… we were all getting into the party mood that night so when the drums around the camp fire started, we were our own tribe dancing around and laughing. I remember a lot of laughing that night, it’ll defs go down as one of the best nights of my life.
Once the band finished up, or escaped, not sure which, we were up to our own devices for entertainment. Of course I had a go on the drums, sounded like crap but who cares, fun is fun!!
All danced out we gathered around to chill and reminisce. Which lasted about 5 minutes before a game of never have I ever started. There may have also been some hash from Chefs going around but what happens on tour stays on tour. Ask me no questions I tell no lies.
The next morning was heaven sent, not only did we have the most memorable previous day but we weren’t required to be human until 10am. For those who over drank, over danced and may have had a little chucky, the late start was a gift. Which literally only lasted until 10am cos then it was into our jeeps for a desert safari. Over hills fast and around quick corners all in sand is exactly what the doctor ordered after a big night…
But somehow the desert air cured all hangovers and at our pit stop in the middle of the Sahara, we were all smiles and once again in amazement at the beauty of the desert.
Special mention to Connor, Amy’s husband and half of the American travel blogging couple who went above and beyond to get the most epic photo. Here’s a video of how and the final pic I stole from their blog!!
Back in our landcruisers, cos they aren’t the same as jeeps, we trekked through the Sahara to a nomad village, one that allows tourists. This family lives on the plains of the Sahara, trekking to the closest town once a week for supplies, but otherwise self sufficient, building their oven in the earth, keeping animals for milk and probs dinner, no electricity and using what the great earth provides them. Now whether these guys actually did all that or were just set up for us tourists, who knows but it sure looked authentic!!!
After having some time to wander around the nomads living area, we gathered in a large tent for Abdul to show us how they make Moroccan tea. All the other places we’d had tea cheated and used a kettle. Here they boiled the water, let it stew, then reboiled and strained it, I think… geez bananas I don’t really remember and I couldn’t take notes while sitting crossed legged in a tent, I’m not like other women, I’m not good at multi tasking. We all got a taste and it was nice but in all honesty, I’ll stick to my western coffee, never have been much of a tea drinker. Back in our cruisers through the desert to our next stop at a renowned musical band. I remember Abdul explained they were quite well known but can’t recall how or why. Of course they got our hips shaking again and the abundance of my chebs meant I was pulled up again to dance, but managed to escape back to my seat to watch the others get into the groove!!
As good as the music was, it was damn hot in the room and not all of us were appreciative of symbols clashing and drums beating given the night we’d had!! I think Abdul got the message and herded us back into our cruisers heading back to camp. Of course it wasn’t just a normal drive back to camp, once again through dunes, past loads of camels and around desert hotels that seemed to spring out of nowhere!!
Back at the hotel and finally, after two non starters, it was pool time. Yes my bathes were overly revealing and I wore a gym top over them but who cares when you’re in cool waters in the middle of the desert. Probs would have jumped in with my pjs on if I had to. And with ice cold beers delivered into our hands while in the pool, it was the place of dreams. Ok I may be over exaggerating but after a hot day cruising the desert, it was pretty damn good. I think we stayed in until our hands and feet looked like 100 year olds then had a quick shower and back into the dunes to watch the sunset over the beautiful Sahara. While waiting for the sun to go down in all its glory, the amazing Emma got her sand surfing skills on, there were drinks and group pics and all the laughing!! Such an awesome group to hang out with!
Another dinner and more dancing around the fire, although not as epic as the night before, bit more low key but still awesome fun all the same!! With an earlyish bedtime, I laid in bed being grateful to be in one of the most beautiful places on earth with such an amazing group of people, it really did feel like a dream. Still does when I think back on it.
With such an awesome group of people to tour Morocco with, of course there was someone, the amazing Laura, with a decent amount of yoga experience to take us through an early morning class. With a 5 hour bus journey this afternoon to Fes, we needed to get moving now before falling into our bus slumber. After searching high and low, quite literally, we checked the roof, we found a landing on one of the floors for about 10 of us to move through some poses. Having discovered an amazing view from the roof we headed back for a few snaps…
Geez it felt good to stretch more than just my arm to a glass of gin. Stretched and prettied up, we were once again heading for the blue city with Abdul giving us free time to roam and take selfies to our hearts content. While the day before I had planned to trek to the Spanish Church, I decided that instead I wanted to explore the city some more, yesterday’s brief visit didn’t feel nearly enough. While Kyles and Ads headed off with the others I was on my lonesome to explore. Well, you’re never really alone here, there’s usually at least 5 cats within arms reach to keep you company! And anyway, I’m not someone that can be around people 24/7, I need alone time and space to think. Not that I got much deep thinking done beyond “Aww what a cute little kitty” and “wow, that’s blue!”. Chefchouen certainly is one of the most prettiest cities I’ve ever gotten lost in, fancy blue doors, ornate knockers, some real some fake, and floor to ceiling blue walls that look more like they’d been carved out of stone than built. And did I mention the kitties?? I was in cat heaven, or maybe it was an insight into my future, alone and surrounded by cats?? Eeek, tried not to think a out that one too much!!
And yes, I did overload on the selfies. If there was ever a time to take a picture with a gorgeous backdrop, the time was nigh. Also did some selfie videos because I’m a Leo, I’m vain. Deal with it.
Having agreed to meet Kylie and her pack in the square at midday to get lunch, I was kinda stood up. Well not kinda, really was. During my wait, I got offered henna (henna not hash mum!) so thought why not?? Abdul had warned us to only to get the green one as the black can get itchy. I thought I’d asked for the green one, but obvs didn’t…
Lucky for me, henna’d and still waiting, Hamish from the tour spotted me looking like a loser and took me up to where some others from the group were having lunch. Let me tell you, getting stood up does not suck when you end up having delicious kofta and hummus with a yummy date and orange blossom smoothie as well as these views…
On the way back to lunch we ran into Kyles and her crew having a quick bite to eat so gathered them and were BOTB for our 5 hour trek to Fes. Here’s some more pics of the blue city to keep you entertained for 5 hours…
Of course we also had the awesome Abdul to keep us entertained, well me anyway, I may have been the only one listening to him went he went into fact mode again! Importantly, he explained the litter and why it was strewn through some of the country towns. Apparently there are no government programs in country towns to collect rubbish so it just gets left out in a pile somewhere, up to the elements of nature to blow it around. Shit, garbage collection was something I have definitely taken for granted! What the Governmwnt does do well is education, all school is free, even university including masters and doctorates. And if you’re poor or live far from a school, the government has places where you can board and eat for free. That’s whole next level making education a priority! Round of applause for Morocco and keep you hands clapping for their taxes, you only pay between 0 – 20% depending on what you earn, if you’re a teacher the max you pay is 11% and if you work the land than you pay none. Impressive. Abdul’s banter was only interrupted by the site of a van carrying about 15 dudes, one just sitting on the tow bar holding on. I guess not everything is perfect here.
Pulling into Fes, Abdul was just as tired as us so the brief on Fes was short, or I was being a bad student and not listening. So Fes has a population of 1.6 million people and the name means axe in Arabic. Also has the oldest Médina in Morocco and is home to the very first university opened in the world, opening in 859 by a lady called Fatima. Finally at the hotel in Fes and geez bananas, it’s like a resort, probs only a 3 star one but has a massive pool, deck chairs and looks like it would have been fancy, in the 70s. After a short chill by the pool because I still didn’t have bathes, it was then a quick outfit change before running out the door to a traditional Berber dinner of dancing, food, performers, all the bells and whistles. I had my favourite dress saved for the night, too bad as I was running out the door I couldn’t find my sandals so had to wear my tiger sneakers, pretty dress and sneakers, classy. At the dinner we were ushered to a table at the front, I should have known better than to sit so close to the stage… not only did I get pulled up the first time when they wanted drummers, but also the second time when just one person from the crowd had to belly dance… lucky for me there was plenty of wine so some how had the balls to dance on stage… sober Holly is embarrassed….
Lucky for me I wasn’t the only one to be picked on, Josh and his gorgeous girlfriend Katherine were whisked away to take part in we didn’t know what… by the end we still didn’t know what they had done, it’s highly possible they are now married….
What a brilliant night it was, amazing food, a little too much wine, shaking those hips and great company. Some dude wanted to take me home and give me sweets, luckily it was just a mate of Abdul’s pulling a prank, I think.
Needless to say the next day we were all a little worse for wear. Must remember there will now always be video evidence. Anyhoo, no time for hangover temple although when Abdul joked that the M of McDonalds actually stands for Morocco, all I wanted to do was curl up in a bed of French fries and cheeseburgers. Pretty sure I wasn’t the only one. But no time for hangovers on tour, it was off the bus for our tour of the Fes Médina, the oldest in the world remember? The Médina tour guide was called Mohammed, apparently the most common name in the world. He had a wicked sense of humour, had some long joke about mother in laws I wish I could remember but all I could still think about was McDonalds. Didn’t help the doors we were at looked like golden arches, could not get maccas out of my head!!
I did remember from Mohammed’s spill that there were 5 things every Médina in Morocco has, a Mosque, a bakery, a Quranic school, somewhere to wash before prayer and… nope, can’t recall the last one and google is being no help. Did also find out that a Riad means a house with a garden, neat. After the Golden Arches we wandered back to the bus and noticed something strange, what the F are those things perched on top of the buildings?
Stalks. Yep, those big arse birds that are supposed to deliver babies, these ones were obvs having a day off!! We were BOTB and headed to a fort, if there’s one thing that makes hangry Holly happy, it’s a fort! For some reason you couldn’t go into the fort, just check out the views of Fes. Yes they were gorgeous but I would have loved to see inside the fort. First I got teased with the Maccas and then the fort…
From the fort it was onto the Poterie de Fes, a massive mosaic place/shop/factory. Nothing like a distraction to get my mind off Maccas and the fort. And it was one hell of a good distraction, beautiful tiles hand cut into shapes and stuck onto absolutely everything, tables, mirrors, fountains, you name it. And all done by hand, dudes with tiny little chisels cutting the tiles, other dudes creating the patterns, others making pottery, others hand painting things. All hand made, if only I had the cashola to ship a tonne to AUS!!
Wandering through the Médina, you could feel the old, but not in a bad way. Gorgeous old windy alleys, donkeys in the streets, cute little streams running through and tiny door ways leading who knows where. And a beautiful markets full of colorful food, beautiful dresses, furniture I would love to buy a load of and lots of dead things, heads especially!
The people around the market were super friendly, every time Liam walked past there were shouts of “Ali Baba” and when asked where we were from and said Australia, we got “Aussie Aussie Aussie” with a massive smile. Although our stomaches were grumbling, our before lunch stop was at the local, uh, scarf maker?? What are people called that make lots of scarfs with those old loom things?? Words aren’t working for me right now. Anyhoo, the owner talked us through all the different types of scarfs, allowing us to feel the different fabrics. One felt like absolute heaven, wanted to curl up in it with my Maccas.
A few purchases later and a wander through the belly dancing outfits and we were all bordering on hangry, well, I was already there. With Mohammed on a mission to take us to lunch we were all a little dubious when he led us through one of those said tiny doors. Did not expect it to open up into this!!!!
Not only did we have lunch in one of the most gorgeous spots, but the pastilla was top notch, if only it came with a side of fries! Fed and feeling nearly human again, we were off to the tannery. It was as we approached and there was a whiff of something dead in the air, I remembered the warning, the place is supposed to absolutely reek. And yep, whoever told me that was right. The place smelt like dead meat that’s rotting… guess that’s kinda what leather is, except it’s the skin… lucky the place is pretty, and they do give you mint to shove up your nose to help with the smell…
Of course, the smell was forgiven when we saw their stash of shoes, handbags, jackets and all the amazing leather goods for sale. If I had a job to go back to I probably would have emptied my bank account on all the beautiful things but being broke and homeless, I just bought a gorgeous pair of slides. Luckily we got out of there before we could cause our bank accounts too much damage, it was BOTB and the brilliant Abdul was taking us to a shopping center to stock up on grog and snacks for our epic desert adventure to kick off the next day. For Kyles and I, we were once again on a different mission, mission bathes!!! The desert had a pool and there was no way we were gonna miss out for the third time! We scoured the mall like crazy people, in and out of every shop until an accessories shop had three pairs, two in our size so that made the decision easy!! Onto snacks and booze, ending up with enough to get a small army fed and smashed. But in half hour flat it was mission accomplished and we unloaded our two trolleys full onto the bus… may have over-ginned if that’s even possible!
Back to the hotel and it was onto our second mission, tickets for Glastonbury! At 6pm on the dot Kyles and I were frantically trying to buy tickets for us and a crew back in AUS but it turned out to be mission impossible. Sad face. Onto the next mission cos that’s what we do. Mission pharmacy and food which required a wander up the street, around a corner, up another street and winning, drugs and pizza in nearly a two hour trek…. oops, left Ads waiting for us at the hotel, hope we wasn’t hungry!! After stuffing our faces in Kyles and Ads room, we called it a night before the beers came out, well I did anyway! With the remenants of a hangover still hanging around and the Sahara beckoning the next day, I desperately needed sleep!!
With a 7.30am BOTB scheduled, you’d think I would have slept in as much as I could, that’s what I do, but for some reason the idea of being near a beautiful beach and not having dipped my feet in the water was all the wake up call I needed. Packed in a jiffy and I wandered down to the beach in near darkness thinking an early morning stroll before brekkie would be just what my meatball body needed. Unfortunately about 150m from the hotel there seemed to be some shady characters lurking in the shadows. In all honesty, there probs was no lurking or shady but my mum’s voice in my head about being safe sent me packing back to the hotel. For the two seconds I was there, it was so pretty!
After a carb overload at brekkie, Kyles was keen for a beach walk thank goodness, between us we’d be able to kick the arse of any lurkers. Of course lurkers were just in my imagination, the beach was beautiful, even before sunrise and made me start to wonder that if the deserts of Morocco were as stunning as the beaches, then maybe this country had it all?? Certainly has all the meatballs…
BOTB for an upcoming 6 hours of bus time in the day, we were lucky enough to at least see the sunrise while we questioned why we weren’t smart enough to download all the Netflix shows the night before. Abdul of course provided us with some entertainment with aussie dude Liam renamed Ali Baba on account of his epic beard, and the James Spader look alike Josh renames Mohammed, none of us were really sure why on that one. Abdul also introduced some Berber/Arabic words, like Shukran, meaning thank you. For some reason it sounded like the word chocolate to me, guess you had to be there. After such a lush beach backdrop it was onto the Morocco I expected, desert for miles, but pretty desert with trees and hills, or maybe it was just countryside?? It definitely felt like a step back in time either way, people making their way around with horse and cart, possibly they were donkies, they wizzed by so fast I’m not completely sure.
With the first half of our 6 hour leg down, it was time for lunch and what better setting than the beautiful Casablanca beach. Now, leading up to the trip, I’d heard of the movie Casablanca but had heard from a few peeps that the place itself was something of a shit hole, not really worth the pit stop. But I think I’d have to disagree. Yes it was obvs set up for tourists but the beach itself was pretty gorgeous, maybe I just love all beaches and could never diss one but I’ll just let the pictures speak for themselves.
After stuffing our faces with salad, cos the salads in Morocco are ginormous and yes you do stuff your face, we went for a quick wander up the foreshore with the 10 spare minutes we had then legged in back to the bus to head for the mosque which we’d heard was kinda big. Big is an understatement of the century. And to say it’s beautiful is another understatement. Don’t know how to describe it but to say it’s one of the most beautiful buildings I’ve seen in my life. Completely different to the cathedrals of the European countries, elegant design on the outside than absolute opulence on the inside. There’s something about the shape of the arches and doorways that I love, and the contrasting colours of the blues and greens set against the sandstone, just stunning and not the Morocco I expected!
Having found the previous day a dress that covers all the things while not sweating me to death, the only requirement to enter the mosque was shoes off. After sweltering outside, the cool marble floor on our feet was more than welcome. As were the bags provided to carry our stinkin shoes, someone had their thinking caps on for that one. The Mosque is actually called the Hassan II Mosque, the King who commissioned it to be the biggest and most grand building in Morocco. Cos that’s what makes a good King, have a massive building named after you, not like, taking care of your people and creating prosperity and equality for all. Anyhoo, Mr Hassan got his wish and it ended up being the largest Mosque in Africa and the third largest in the world. When it cost a whopping $600 – $800 million USD to build, you’d certainly hope so. The King didn’t have all that cashola himself so Saudi Arabia, Kuwait and Dubai spotted him, he obvs didn’t listen to his mother, if you can’t afford it, you don’t need it. Besides the money thing and do you really “need” a big arse Mosque, the fact that all the building materials were sourced in Morocco is pretty impressive. Well, except the Venetian glass and white marble which came from Italy but guess they don’t have those things in Morocco. And second most impressively (that’s a word right?) is that the white marble columns are natural humidifiers, somehow the marble absorbs the humidity in the air. For reals. And third most impressively, this place fits 25,000 people inside and 85,000 outside in the square. Sure women have to use the upstairs platforms to worship but it’s a matter of custom, at lest they are allowed in. Ok, so now for the most impressive of the impressively’s (defs not a word), the roof opens!!!! I kid you not, the place has a retractable roof, just like a football or tennis stadium. So worshippers can be closer to god, no wait, so they can have all the elements present when worshipping I think? There were these water well things in there too so I think it has something to do with that. So apparently with all these impressively’s it took 6 years to build, with people work ing 24/7 in 3 shifts. That’s some epic project management! The inside though, just wow upon wow and all the impressively’s in the world!! Unfortunately in discussing the impressively’s I think I swore, probs going to hell..
So in learning some more about the Muslim religion from our Mosque tour hostess, she talked about the importance of being clean before you pray. Given they pray five times a day, that’s a lotta cleaning. I think she saw our confused faces so she explained that it’s ok to just wash your hands before praying, however if praying at this super impressive mosque, the whole bottom floor is dedicated to these water features where people can clean themselves. I know water features is NOT the right name but seriously can’t remember and no idea what to google to find out. They look a little something like this…
Back outside the Mosque we wandered through a museum but as far as museums go, eh. After a super impressive Mosque, not much could impress. That Mosque was so damn impressive it deserves a million more pics…
BOTB and Abdul got his google on again with some more tantalizing info about Moroccan customs. And I’m not being sarcastic, really love this stuff!! So the current King, Mohammed IV is newly single, hot gossip in Morocco! The goss is that he’s divorcing his wife, who has been missing from public duties of late. Hmm, single King, single Holly… yeah, not Muslim otherwise i’m sure I’d be in with a chance!?! And more impressively than the Mosque, Morocco is a democracy, well, as close as possible. The people elect the parliament and the King chooses the Prime Minister from the winning party. And most super impressively, and maybe I naively didn’t expect, theres decent equality for women in Morocco. Women are entitled to do all jobs with the exception of the call to prayer, religious thing so understandable, and females can’t be King or Prime Minister. For the King bit, if they have only daughters, then he chooses another male in the dynasty to take the reins. The King thing I get, the UK line of succession has only recently been updated to be more 21st century but the PM thing, not so sure about. Maybe in time things might change, maybe. There are plenty of other countries with lots of work to do to get to their standards, and for an African nation, I think that’s impressive. Luckily it wasn’t far to the hotel, otherwise my head would have gone into overload! Once there it was the usual checkin and poor Aleesha was defs stuck with me. A couple of coldies later we were BOTB yet again and headed for the market area of Casablanca and around the city. This was when I began to understand the blah about Casablanca, it was pretty dodgy if I’m honest!! Luckily though it’s got all the great western offerings like KFC, which made for a loo dash, all that water goes straight through ya… sorry, too much info!
Abdul once again did good and took us to a local for a dinner of, you guessed it, tagine! Yes there was pasta and other western things on the menu but when in Morocco! I sure as hell won’t be able to figure out how to cook a tagine once I get home, although really wish I could, they are kinda one pot wonders and that’s my specialty. After once again feeling like a stuffed meatball we were BOTB to the hotel where straight to bed is never an option so we gave the bar some business and ate Toblerone, those three humongous ones I somehow managed to snag in duty free on our gin fueled run for the plane. If left with me I’d be a chocolate covered meatball before too long so happy to share. It was over toblerone and gin that Josh learnt about his doppelgänger, although when I said James Spader he had no idea who he was, these young ones… of course we got our google on and a young Spader next to Josh was uncanny. If only I took a pic… here’s Josh tho, what do ya think??
Once again the 7am BOTB meant no time to play, just sleep before another long arse bus ride. BTW, a 7am BOTB is when the bus departs, before that showers and brekkie is required so I’m not quite the granny you think!!
Up and BOTB at 7am, it was onto Rabat, the capital of Morocco. To me, the name just sounds like Rabbit said real fast but I think it’s just my lack of concentration so early in the morning, my brain doesn’t function until at least 10am. Only an hourish later and we were pulling into what I’m calling the Rabat warren, the place was crazy! Four lane roundabouts and police having to direct traffic everywhere cos people were nuts. At least the officers looked damn good doing it, check this chick out:
Our first stop in the warren was the unfinished mosque and museum of King Mohammed V. You rock up to the place and it’s pretty impressive with the royal guard on horses, not sure exactly what they are protecting but certainly wouldn’t wanna mess with these dudes!
Abdul ushered us past the guard and into the mosque grounds, he didn’t need to explain what was meant by unfinished…
The plan was for the mosque to have 253 columns to represent the days of the Muslim lunar calendar, but they only made it to 80 something I think. Didn’t quite listen to everything Abdul said, too busy looking and I can’t do both so had to ask Wikipedia for some help… apparently some dude called Yusuf Yaqub al-Mansur, member of the Almohad Caliphate, a Berber Muslim empirecommissioned a tower that was intended to be the largest minaret in the world along with the mosque, also intended to be the world’s largest. Again, why do men measure their worth by building the biggest something?? Anyhoo, when the dude died in 1199, construction stopped. But now I get why the guards are here, I tuned into Abdul again once he started talking about the Mausoleum of King Mohammed V, a King is buried here, makes sense. Never been so close to a King before, dead or alive. This King was so important because he kicked arse and worked hard for the independence of Morocco, he was their Nelson Mandela. This dude I would have liked. Heading to the Mausoleum, the site is stunning, even unfinished. Can hardly imagine how magnificent it would have been. The Mausoleum once again had the stern looking guards, and inside a man chanting the Quran so no talking, pictures ok but no flash. Have to say, there is something about the Arabic/Berber language I think sounds so beautiful. Especially when sung. Might have to get some Arabic music on my playlist. The Mausoleum was beautiful inside, as expected, and strangely, had a feeling of power and grace. Probs makes no sense to others but you certainly felt moved and privileged to be there.
Once exited and a million more pictures of the site later, it was a quick pit stop in the loo before it was BOTB. That was when I realised my sin. The pretty long sleeve red dress I was wearing, perfect for Florence, not so much Morocco, was lined in the bottom half, but quite see through in the top half. Faaaaark. Hadn’t even looked in the mirror properly until then, pretty sure I got ready with my eyes shut. Needless to say the colour of my face was the same as my dress. Felt like I had completely disrespected the sanctity of the Mausoleum and get why the guards looked so angry. Wish someone had told me but anyhoo. Abdul was nice enough to let me get my bag from underneath the bus to find a top for underneath the dress. Have to say I was quite sheepish for the next few hours. But mistakes happen so I put my embarrassment aside and onto the Médina of Rabat where we had another lovely tour guide join us, this time I got his name, Yusuf, just like the dude with the unfinished mosque. Yusuf was a character too, love the Moroccan sense of humour. He toured us through a place I’m gonna call a fort, looked like one but is actually a Kasbah, I know what you’re thinking.. “Rock the Kasbah, rock the Kasbah…”, that was stuck in all our heads and may have made it out loud more than once.
This Kasbah of the Udayas as Google tells me is like a keep, every Moroccan city has one. Keep, fort, same same, both have a defensive wall. And just for the record, the song Rock the Casbah by The Clash is about the ban of Western Rock music by an Arab King, kinda feel like it was written for our trip though. Must stop relying on Google for my blogs… Anyhoo, as I love a fort, I love me a Kasbah. Old bricked paths that twist and turn, so much so that we kinda got lost. About 8 of us too busy singing I think and lost sight of Abdul. Ooopsy. But being lost is fun, you walk real fast so see more. And also stop for silly pictures!!
Turns out that in a Kasbah all roads lead to the same place and we managed to find Abdul. Or he managed to find us, same same. Yusuf relieved our stress heads with a story of why cats are his best friends and have his phone number. Long story and the adrenalin was still pumping so don’t remember it all, just the punchline. Cats found a massive treasure in a house once, so now everyone loves cats. Explains why there’s a zillion of them everywhere you look. Wandering around and taking in the pretty, we emerged into a Kasbah oasis. A beautiful lush green garden surrounded by the pink walls of the Kasbah, awww, Rabat you’re so pretty!! I take back the quip about you being a warren.
Never been so relieved to be BOTB and thankful for Amy’s Dad joke as we passed by a gorgeous cemetery… How many dead people are in the cemetery? All of them!!! Haha, my kind of humour. Miss my Dad!! Heading further into Rabat, we’re told it’s the city of green. All the roofs have green tiles which is pretty but have to admit, I like the look of Marrakech better. Abdul also explains the colours of the Moroccan flag, green is the colour of the Arab, red the colour of the Berber and white means peace. Ahh, also get the colours of the cities now too. And the star on the flag has 5 points to represent the 5 pillars of Islam. May have mentioned that before but so many things in my head I’m not sure. Next stop is the Palace of the King, an alive one this time. Apparently the dude even lives here so we’re not allowed in to get our tourist on, just allowed a token snap by the gates. But have to say, as the bus drove into said gate, wowsers. The gardens and site is immaculate. Understandable given 500 people work there as Abdul the Google tells us, and is set over 5 acres, apparently there’s a Necropolis of Roman ruins in there too but we’re not royal enough to see it.
“Yallah”, let’s go!! That’s now how Abdul herds us back on the bus, don’t mind being herded though when it comes with a smile and a pat on the back as we get on the bus like his little herd of stray cats. And now, we’re bound for Chefchaouen, the blue city and source of a zillion Instagram snaps. Even has its very own Instagram alley. Literally a spot designated for the best pics for Instagram. For a city so famous, it’s name is kinda hard to say. To me it’s like Chef-shh-ow-en, but that’s in my Aussie bogan, when Abdul says the name is sounds so much more pretty! With a four hour trip ahead of us, it’s lucky Morocco is so damn pretty, and that everyone was smart enough to download from Netflix for this leg of the trip. Of course, Abdul being an awesome guide and passionate about his country downloaded his Google pages about Morocco and the blue city, which I’ll just call it cos it’s real name is too hard to spell right every time. As we’re now well and truly in outback Morocco, we’re told that there’s 25 different types of scorpions in Morocco, nice to know considering we’re due to spend two nights in the desert shortly. But relief, there’s no Cobra’s in the desert, just in the mountains. FFS, we’re literally snaking our way through the mountains on the way to be blue city (like my pun? Snaking? I know, you’re not funny if you have to explain your jokes!) More animal facts, Morocco used to have Lions, until 1964 when us humans slaughtered so many there’s none left in the wild. Damn humans. There are plenty of Camels left in the wild though, although they are camels with only one hump so called a dromedary, the ones with two humps are in Saudi. Onto my favourite subject, food!! As we already know, they love their tagines and pastilla in Morocco, and they also love their couscous and cows feet. Yeah one of them I won’t be trying. They are also keen on tea with mint although Abdul warned against drinking the “water of life” from figs, apparently one glass will knock you out for days and you won’t remember a thing. Probs not something to tell a bus full of aussies but anyway. This was when Abdul left us all speechless by telling us that as per his Muslim beliefs, he has never tried beer, wine, cigarettes or hash. Dude is clean as a whistle. I wonder if he knows about gin?? Onto more facts, cos this nerd certainly hasn’t had enough! The national sport of course is football, well, soccer if we’re talking Aussie. Second most popular, marathon running. Did not expect that! Done with the talking, we were left to enjoy the countryside and/or do our own marathons, the Netflix variety. Taking some time to look out the window rather than binge, Morocco is certainly beautiful, a countryside of donkeys, goats and olive trees but in all honesty, some parts look quite poor and run down. There is quite a lot of rubbish on the streets in some towns we pass through. But people have a simple life out here, they live off and work the land. They don’t have to worry about careers and those things we rate as first world problems. The shrink wannabe in me wonders if they are happier, I’m sure there’s a study that says so.
Nearing the blue city, Abdul gets his google on again for our intro to Chefchauoen. Just gonna spell it wrong! So the place is known for being blue, got that, but also well known for its goats cheese, olive oil and hash. Hash as in pot, but stronger and kinda illegal but ok to buy if you wanna smoke it. Not sure how that works but ok. Apparently as a dude, you’ll get offered it by every second person but the chicks not so much, it’s a respect thing. Nice to know. To say the blue city sticks out like a sore thumb is an understatement. The countryside is all red soil with green, green, green then there’s the big spot of blue on the hillside, looks a little something like this:
Pretty damn gorgeous if you ask me, I expected blue but not so blue, makes no sense at all I know but the size and blueness is more than I expected. I’ll let that one go. Jumping off the bus in Chefs (which I’ll now call it) and we’re immediately greeted by pretty rainbow stairs, guess they know how to do tourist.
It’s a short walk up the road and through the square until we’re surrounded by blue. And yes, a chorus of “I’m blue da ba dee da ba daa” started in my head and wasn’t going anywhere!! Really am showing my age! Abdul took us on a brief tour through the city, stopping at Instagram Alley for a group shot before letting us loose! Then it was blue upon blue upon blue…
There was the option of a hike up to the hill/mountain to the Spanish Church, a feat some of us preferred to save for the next day. Instead we wandered the blue city, finding the dude who for 5 bucks would let you use his blue as blue can be room for snaps. Needless to say us Insta hungry crazies took part, some good shots but I’m not much of a poser so felt like a knob!!
With sunset beckoning, we tried to grab a quick dinner then head up the hill a little ways to watch. Unfortunately our “quick” shawarmas took 40 minutes and we literally ran to a spot with a view for what was a magical sunset over the blue city. As you guessed it, there were a zillion upon zillion pictures, this place is just so pretty you almost can’t help yourself!!
Well and truly touristed out for the day, we did what aussies do best, found beer!! Of course being a massive tourist attraction, they had a pub and we swarmed like bees to honey. And once again, free food! A zillion plates of hot chips as freebies, Moroccans certainly give Italians a run for their money on feeding people!
Fed and watered we were BOTB and pretty happy so when Abdul started playing some background music it turned into a full blown karaoke session with the likes of Toto Africa (of course), Shakira, Hakuna Matata, ABBA and some Brittany and Bieber thrown in for good measure. But of course the track that got everyone Mo-rockin was Bohemian Rhapsody!
Back at the hotel we were either tired or sheepish about our singing antics, either way it was bed time and more beauty sleep ready for more Insta snaps in Chefs the next day.
Holly vs the world 