Wednesday 2nd October – Thursday 3rd October 2019

With such an awesome group of people to tour Morocco with, of course there was someone, the amazing Laura, with a decent amount of yoga experience to take us through an early morning class. With a 5 hour bus journey this afternoon to Fes, we needed to get moving now before falling into our bus slumber. After searching high and low, quite literally, we checked the roof, we found a landing on one of the floors for about 10 of us to move through some poses. Having discovered an amazing view from the roof we headed back for a few snaps…

Geez it felt good to stretch more than just my arm to a glass of gin. Stretched and prettied up, we were once again heading for the blue city with Abdul giving us free time to roam and take selfies to our hearts content. While the day before I had planned to trek to the Spanish Church, I decided that instead I wanted to explore the city some more, yesterday’s brief visit didn’t feel nearly enough. While Kyles and Ads headed off with the others I was on my lonesome to explore. Well, you’re never really alone here, there’s usually at least 5 cats within arms reach to keep you company! And anyway, I’m not someone that can be around people 24/7, I need alone time and space to think. Not that I got much deep thinking done beyond “Aww what a cute little kitty” and “wow, that’s blue!”. Chefchouen certainly is one of the most prettiest cities I’ve ever gotten lost in, fancy blue doors, ornate knockers, some real some fake, and floor to ceiling blue walls that look more like they’d been carved out of stone than built. And did I mention the kitties?? I was in cat heaven, or maybe it was an insight into my future, alone and surrounded by cats?? Eeek, tried not to think a out that one too much!!

And yes, I did overload on the selfies. If there was ever a time to take a picture with a gorgeous backdrop, the time was nigh. Also did some selfie videos because I’m a Leo, I’m vain. Deal with it.

Having agreed to meet Kylie and her pack in the square at midday to get lunch, I was kinda stood up. Well not kinda, really was. During my wait, I got offered henna (henna not hash mum!) so thought why not?? Abdul had warned us to only to get the green one as the black can get itchy. I thought I’d asked for the green one, but obvs didn’t…

Lucky for me, henna’d and still waiting, Hamish from the tour spotted me looking like a loser and took me up to where some others from the group were having lunch. Let me tell you, getting stood up does not suck when you end up having delicious kofta and hummus with a yummy date and orange blossom smoothie as well as these views…

On the way back to lunch we ran into Kyles and her crew having a quick bite to eat so gathered them and were BOTB for our 5 hour trek to Fes. Here’s some more pics of the blue city to keep you entertained for 5 hours…

Of course we also had the awesome Abdul to keep us entertained, well me anyway, I may have been the only one listening to him went he went into fact mode again! Importantly, he explained the litter and why it was strewn through some of the country towns. Apparently there are no government programs in country towns to collect rubbish so it just gets left out in a pile somewhere, up to the elements of nature to blow it around. Shit, garbage collection was something I have definitely taken for granted! What the Governmwnt does do well is education, all school is free, even university including masters and doctorates. And if you’re poor or live far from a school, the government has places where you can board and eat for free. That’s whole next level making education a priority! Round of applause for Morocco and keep you hands clapping for their taxes, you only pay between 0 – 20% depending on what you earn, if you’re a teacher the max you pay is 11% and if you work the land than you pay none. Impressive. Abdul’s banter was only interrupted by the site of a van carrying about 15 dudes, one just sitting on the tow bar holding on. I guess not everything is perfect here.

Pulling into Fes, Abdul was just as tired as us so the brief on Fes was short, or I was being a bad student and not listening. So Fes has a population of 1.6 million people and the name means axe in Arabic. Also has the oldest Médina in Morocco and is home to the very first university opened in the world, opening in 859 by a lady called Fatima. Finally at the hotel in Fes and geez bananas, it’s like a resort, probs only a 3 star one but has a massive pool, deck chairs and looks like it would have been fancy, in the 70s. After a short chill by the pool because I still didn’t have bathes, it was then a quick outfit change before running out the door to a traditional Berber dinner of dancing, food, performers, all the bells and whistles. I had my favourite dress saved for the night, too bad as I was running out the door I couldn’t find my sandals so had to wear my tiger sneakers, pretty dress and sneakers, classy. At the dinner we were ushered to a table at the front, I should have known better than to sit so close to the stage… not only did I get pulled up the first time when they wanted drummers, but also the second time when just one person from the crowd had to belly dance… lucky for me there was plenty of wine so some how had the balls to dance on stage… sober Holly is embarrassed….

Lucky for me I wasn’t the only one to be picked on, Josh and his gorgeous girlfriend Katherine were whisked away to take part in we didn’t know what… by the end we still didn’t know what they had done, it’s highly possible they are now married….

What a brilliant night it was, amazing food, a little too much wine, shaking those hips and great company. Some dude wanted to take me home and give me sweets, luckily it was just a mate of Abdul’s pulling a prank, I think.

Needless to say the next day we were all a little worse for wear. Must remember there will now always be video evidence. Anyhoo, no time for hangover temple although when Abdul joked that the M of McDonalds actually stands for Morocco, all I wanted to do was curl up in a bed of French fries and cheeseburgers. Pretty sure I wasn’t the only one. But no time for hangovers on tour, it was off the bus for our tour of the Fes Médina, the oldest in the world remember? The Médina tour guide was called Mohammed, apparently the most common name in the world. He had a wicked sense of humour, had some long joke about mother in laws I wish I could remember but all I could still think about was McDonalds. Didn’t help the doors we were at looked like golden arches, could not get maccas out of my head!!

I did remember from Mohammed’s spill that there were 5 things every Médina in Morocco has, a Mosque, a bakery, a Quranic school, somewhere to wash before prayer and… nope, can’t recall the last one and google is being no help. Did also find out that a Riad means a house with a garden, neat. After the Golden Arches we wandered back to the bus and noticed something strange, what the F are those things perched on top of the buildings?

Stalks. Yep, those big arse birds that are supposed to deliver babies, these ones were obvs having a day off!! We were BOTB and headed to a fort, if there’s one thing that makes hangry Holly happy, it’s a fort! For some reason you couldn’t go into the fort, just check out the views of Fes. Yes they were gorgeous but I would have loved to see inside the fort. First I got teased with the Maccas and then the fort…

From the fort it was onto the Poterie de Fes, a massive mosaic place/shop/factory. Nothing like a distraction to get my mind off Maccas and the fort. And it was one hell of a good distraction, beautiful tiles hand cut into shapes and stuck onto absolutely everything, tables, mirrors, fountains, you name it. And all done by hand, dudes with tiny little chisels cutting the tiles, other dudes creating the patterns, others making pottery, others hand painting things. All hand made, if only I had the cashola to ship a tonne to AUS!!

Wandering through the Médina, you could feel the old, but not in a bad way. Gorgeous old windy alleys, donkeys in the streets, cute little streams running through and tiny door ways leading who knows where. And a beautiful markets full of colorful food, beautiful dresses, furniture I would love to buy a load of and lots of dead things, heads especially!

The people around the market were super friendly, every time Liam walked past there were shouts of “Ali Baba” and when asked where we were from and said Australia, we got “Aussie Aussie Aussie” with a massive smile. Although our stomaches were grumbling, our before lunch stop was at the local, uh, scarf maker?? What are people called that make lots of scarfs with those old loom things?? Words aren’t working for me right now. Anyhoo, the owner talked us through all the different types of scarfs, allowing us to feel the different fabrics. One felt like absolute heaven, wanted to curl up in it with my Maccas.

A few purchases later and a wander through the belly dancing outfits and we were all bordering on hangry, well, I was already there. With Mohammed on a mission to take us to lunch we were all a little dubious when he led us through one of those said tiny doors. Did not expect it to open up into this!!!!

Not only did we have lunch in one of the most gorgeous spots, but the pastilla was top notch, if only it came with a side of fries! Fed and feeling nearly human again, we were off to the tannery. It was as we approached and there was a whiff of something dead in the air, I remembered the warning, the place is supposed to absolutely reek. And yep, whoever told me that was right. The place smelt like dead meat that’s rotting… guess that’s kinda what leather is, except it’s the skin… lucky the place is pretty, and they do give you mint to shove up your nose to help with the smell…

Of course, the smell was forgiven when we saw their stash of shoes, handbags, jackets and all the amazing leather goods for sale. If I had a job to go back to I probably would have emptied my bank account on all the beautiful things but being broke and homeless, I just bought a gorgeous pair of slides. Luckily we got out of there before we could cause our bank accounts too much damage, it was BOTB and the brilliant Abdul was taking us to a shopping center to stock up on grog and snacks for our epic desert adventure to kick off the next day. For Kyles and I, we were once again on a different mission, mission bathes!!! The desert had a pool and there was no way we were gonna miss out for the third time! We scoured the mall like crazy people, in and out of every shop until an accessories shop had three pairs, two in our size so that made the decision easy!! Onto snacks and booze, ending up with enough to get a small army fed and smashed. But in half hour flat it was mission accomplished and we unloaded our two trolleys full onto the bus… may have over-ginned if that’s even possible!

Back to the hotel and it was onto our second mission, tickets for Glastonbury! At 6pm on the dot Kyles and I were frantically trying to buy tickets for us and a crew back in AUS but it turned out to be mission impossible. Sad face. Onto the next mission cos that’s what we do. Mission pharmacy and food which required a wander up the street, around a corner, up another street and winning, drugs and pizza in nearly a two hour trek…. oops, left Ads waiting for us at the hotel, hope we wasn’t hungry!! After stuffing our faces in Kyles and Ads room, we called it a night before the beers came out, well I did anyway! With the remenants of a hangover still hanging around and the Sahara beckoning the next day, I desperately needed sleep!!